Ok, sorry if I offend, but I do think our Gordie needs to hear this:
"She literally became the opposite of who she was. I was told she was Bi-polar, had a personality disorder (Histrionic or Borderline), that she was severely mentally ill, and at the time I could have believed she was ALL of those things at once. There were days I honestly thought she was possessed and she scared the hell out of me. Turns out she was a depressed text book MLC'r...and that was about it. So then the scared little beauty queen had to learn to fight her way out of the abyss she found herself in. She created so much havoc, so much pain, so many bad memories that would have to overcome...she didn't dig a hole...she dug a canyon. And she stayed down there for a long time...angry, confused, and digging like mad. Then she worked her way out of the canyon...but she was on the opposite side of it than me & our family. She was doing no more evil...but she was still alone, scared and even more confused. Now she had to figure out how to bridge that gap.
I cannot fathom what that must have been like...not being able to trust anything your mind tells you. Your memories are off, your reasoning is off, you have trust issues and everyone that has loved and supported you is now mad and disappointed in you. Now...in this diminished capacity...go out and solve the biggest problem you have ever seen. It is no small accomplishment. I know my own capacity was severely diminished during all of this...and my thinking was far from straight for most of it. But my trip was like jumping over a crack in the sidewalk compared to her Grand Canyon leaps.
Looking back after our [vow renewal] ceremony...it was so clear to see how hard it was for both of us...but also how much farther she had to come. She had to build a lot of bridges, one at a time, to reattach herself to her world and her family. Looking back that is so easy to see. Living it...being the last bridge built...at the time felt like it took forever. Today it feels like a blip on the radar."
