Hey Focus... I have just come to these same realizations. In my case, the alcoholic is my dad but everything you say above resonants with me. I know exactly what you are saying. My whole life I wondered why my dad was so closed off.... now I see. My dad would never admit how dependent he was on alcohol until very recently. To be honest, I never realized the grip that alcohol had on him or how severe the physical and mental dependency is. Looking back, I can see the codependency this caused with my mom. Really unfortunate.
