I did something last night that really helped me. I wrote down how many times I've been knocked down by Hs actions in recent months. For me it went something like:
Found out about the affair - processed and came to terms he left - processed and came to terms He came back and left - processed and came to terms He came back and left - processed and came to terms he told me about OWs sexual preferences - processed and dismissed from mind found further lies - processed and dismissed visited most days and talked about R - processed and dealt found out back with OW - processed and ACTED stopped visiting - processed and came to terms stopped communicating - processed and came to terms told me he would never live with me again - processed and came to terms met to discuss split of assets - processed and acting on it
etc etc
Noticed a theme. I can cope. Now thinking " come on then, what's next, bring it on"
There are stages to this 'thing' Few us of get BD and then that's it. We get lots and lots of shrapnel thereafter. Look what we can cope with. Every one of us.
