From what you wrote it sounds more like indifference is starting to take hold, than more detachment. To me you sound well detached from W and her behaviour. Your post seems like an accurate retelling of events, with no emotional pains - detached.
Indifference is a strange place. Your feelings for W will lessen greatly, and your thoughts will follow suit. Just like when you were full of passion and frustration after BD. Your thoughts will follow your feelings. Only then it caused pain, now it will cause nothingness.
Tap into your beliefs.
The sweet welcomed relief of indifference does hit a bump as you adjust to this new emotional state. In short since your feeling towards W have lessened, other ones will seem much larger than they really are. Stay the course, things will settle.
Tap into your beliefs. It is here that you will find what you are seeking. The answers and reasons you are searching for.
I understand when you say the less you feel towards W, the less you feel like reconciling. You need to find the other reasons, the ones not based on just feelings, the ones from your core. Be patient and do not do anything drastic. This takes time and will be well worth it.
- - - -
Your upcoming conflict. Kids vs BILs.
I like the way you stated it, you feel pretty conflicted about it. Very accurate sjohns, well done. You are not weighting the pro and cons of going or not, you are conflicted, struggling with what you want against what you should. More or less.
At any rate, to me it looks like your scales have already started to lean one way. I could be way off base here, but it looks like you are wanting a nudge. Pick your kids.
I hope your son has a great time at his VB tournament. It would be really nice to get a first place finish.
I am sorry if I overstepped. I have faced some conflicts about family (kids) vs friends, or fun, or even extended family. I chose family every time, and have never regretted it.
Take care
DnJ
Feelings are fleeting. Be better, not bitter. Love the person, forgive the sin.
