When I read about MLCrs on peoples threads, they all sound really crazy to me ... so for those of you who have read my sitch, do you think this is MLC? Or is this a guy who just doesn’t want to be married anymore?
I agree, I sometimes read the threads and I wonder how people can be so cruel.
Do I think your H has MLC. I am no expert, but your sitch sounds closer to mine than most here and from everything I've read, I would say my H definitely had it and possibly still does. Before he left he showed all the tell tale signs (apart from the affair). My H, like yours, was running away as opposed to running to something, which I think helps in our sitch. He has finally admitted he has depression which I guess is a small but positive step towards him coming out of it. I suspect it is a long journey back though. Not back to me necessarily, but towards him finally seeing straight.
Undoubtedly, the thought that he no longer wants to be married has crossed your H's mind more than once in the last 4 years. It would be so much easier if he were not married. Then it would be done. It would be final. But, he hasn't filed the paperwork. So, he too fears the finality of it. Don't push. Don't look for answers.
Waiting for the right moment my a$$. There is no right moment to have that conversation and he knows it. He is making excuses to his daughter for his own lack of conviction. This is why we are told not to initiate R conversations. They are not ready. In the case, he was trying to save face in front of his daughter.
I wouldn't worry. Believe nothing they say and only half of what they do.
