If things are working okay at the moment, I wouldn't push to head in a new direction. You have to remember...she's leading the dance at the moment. This is her crisis and she will take as long as she needs to heal and you can't rush the process or the results could be very negative.
Can you look at her as a possible roommate, someone you can share experiences with? Talk about your day a bit, ask how her day went, etc. Plan some fun activities not just with her, but w/the kids and ask if she would like to join you. If she says no, don't get upset...but by asking, you will have put the ball back in her court. If you know what her interests are, then you can work on that angle. For example, if she likes craft shows, then look for some craft shows and mention them to her. Everything you do needs to be kept on the download with no pressure and no expectations. Keep things light and fun. You can try to give her a hug once in a while, but don't expect anything in return. If she appears uncomfortable with hugs, then stop them.
Dig deeper for patience, keep those expectations at zero because you are starting out once again developing a friendship w/someone "new". You may want to rush things a bit, but slow down! You are working on her time clock and that clock is mighty slow. It's one step at a time.
Keep the focus on you and dig deeper for patience! Rome wasn't built in a day and a new relationship has to take time to develop.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
