Each day that goes by, I have a stronger premonition that I will someday be a divorced woman. Nothing significant has really happened, in fact I’ve had a couple of nice interactions with H recently, but the feeling is there all the same. Maybe the premonition is a mask for worry?
S21 is home this weekend. Haven’t really seen him too much, but it’s nice to have him in the house. Both the kids will be home most of December into January. It will be nice to have them here, for sure. S has said numerous times that he hopes dad is back living at home by Thanksgiving. I just say I don’t know what will happen. We have to see. I asked him if he has been able to talk to H about it. He said H won’t say anything. And when he did bring it up, he said something to the effect of “Well, it’s not like someone died”. I don’t know the exact words. S tends to paraphrase greatly. But anything remotely like that. WTF! Can’t H see that even though our kids are adults, this affects them greatly? All I can do is reassure my kids my feelings about it and for them, and express my understanding that it’s difficult for them too.
H had a significant life event yesterday (meeting a half brother for the first time). Guess who he called right after leaving the meeting? Yep. Yours truly. We chatted about it for a while. I guess he still feels close enough to me to want to share something important. I was curious about it, but I wasn’t going to ask. I stayed on the phone way too long. Got to get better with being the first to say “gotta go”.
I have GAL plans tonight, then the week will wiz by as usual with work, bootcamp several evenings, my Meetup.org walk, and Church Choir (this will be my first week). No plans next weekend yet. Gotta work on that.
