Is this a normal response to a 180?

[TJT]

I realize now that my W did everything she could to get me to file for a D. I didnt take the bait, because i dont believe in it. She will have to live with what shes done to our family and she will have to take responsibility for D to our S.

This is something I have the hardest with. I am realizing the same in my sitch, that my H really just wants me to file to make his own guilt lessen.

I am conflicted with that because I feel like if I filed for D, it would be the ultimate 180. However, I don't actually want the D, and I feel like it just gives him what he wants then...but if he doesn't seem to be basing any other behavior on the legal fact of us being married or not, then I wonder if I should care either and at least D just to avoid further financial/legal complications down the road. But then I go back the other way again, thinking that under no circumstances should I do it because it's HIS choices that he needs to execute.

My H has even agreed to pay me money directly for his portion of things that I'm still paying, since legally I can't just kick him off of some accounts (at least not without high risk to me). And I'm sitting here trying to imagine, for how long is H going to be willing to pay money directly to his still-W that he's no longer living with? I mean, any person who knows he's A) still married, and B) paying money to me because we're still married and haven't separated finances, would have to be crazy not to raise an eyebrow.

But, the crazy land of la la is indeed real. There is absolute proof of that!