Whirlwind of Hurt 4

[Again18]

TF- that was a hard read for a lot of us. The way you put this to words though and the way you are expressing yourself here to all of us, really says a lot about you and your character. I know we all make mistakes and when put in a situation like this we have evaluate ourselves and sometimes come to some pretty difficult realizations about ourselves. But we can tell that you are a great guy, good father and a loving husband that does not deserve what you are going through. But worst of all your kids don't deserve this. Yes, your wife is selfish and s miserable person right now. But this is when the real work starts. If you hold bitterness in your heart she will only continue to justify her actions. Leave the bitterness there and work with it, because that's ok, but don't let her see it. Don't give her the satisfaction of justifying her actions. Now is the time to really limit your contact with her but when you see or hear from her be as happy as you possible can be. When she sees how happy you are, which is all she wants is to be happy herself imagine what will go through her mind. Is he really that happy without me? Why? About a week after I had left the house and was living on my own, I would come and see the kids in the evening times. I smiled, laughed and played with the kids and I was cheerful and kind to my wife. She said you seem happy. Yes, Happy is a state of mind and although I suffered greatly from the loss I was going through I knew I was on the right side of things. Be the man she always wanted but don't pursue her don't let her know you are available to be pursued just be. Don't be quick to engage and don't talk about the relationship. She will just bounce back into justify mode. Keep working on yourself GAL GAL GAL. You want her but you don't need her, that is how you frame it in your mind. In the end you may decide you don't want her and that is okay too. But right now you do. Don't let yourself try and imagine what is going through her mind. She was as hurt about your kids as you were. It's said that she begs your daughter to not be mad at her, when your daughter has every right to be mad. After all your wife feels like she is entitled to have all of these negative feelings about you, and that is sad, that is so so sad. Sad that she can be mad at you and frustrated and feel like you are the blame for everything but her daughter is justified in being angry is not entitled to that because oh my gosh that is going to hurt poor mommy. I digress, but it hurts all of us, we feel what you feel TF and we pray for you and your family everyday. God Bless you and your family.