Let's look at these one at a time. Tough one first. Your W is going to date and have $ex. Just the reality of it. If you could ever get the truth out of them this is why they do it because they think there is something better out there. My ex told me she wants those butterfly in her stomach feelings again. Keep in mind most men want to date younger girls, most men will want nothing to do with your three young kids and I think 1/3 of men over 40 have ED. I am dating now and talking to woman and they indicate that thy were shocked at the selection of available men. They are either broke, out of shape or creepy and stalkerish. That is going to greatly reduce the dating pool for her. I just read in a book I am reading that is way easier for a middle aged man to find a suitable mate then a woman.
This is outstanding perspective and narrative. My W's chosen OM, while younger, was so deficient I couldn't believe she ever saw anything in him. The only thing he had going for him was he is a good singer. But he was a divorced felon, lived with his elderly father, had no job, was driving a 2001 Pontiac Sunfire. Had started a business, under the table, to detail cars and his only advertising was word of mouth and Facebook. Further he was 18 years her junior, and my W is an extremely conservative woman. It would have been so interesting to see how she dealt with someone that had such different values and likes.
But he had one thing going for him....he wasn't me. So while in every other area of life I was off the chart more desirable, she fixated on that one thing.
I remember telling her after I discovered the EA, and did a background check on this loser, "I can just imagine you bringing him to meet your dad." Her dad would have excoriated this guy, and I can't imagine how hard he would have come down on her.
But again, at the time, she didn't care anything about that. All she cared about was that he wasn't me....and he was giving her attention.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
