First Post - need advise fast please

[Rose888]

One thing it took me decades to learn is that H would rather deal with problems than have me nag him in an attempt to prevent problems.

For example, one time shortly after BD, H was taking kids to the dentist. When I would have left the house, they were still there. I bit my tongue hard and didn't say anything about it being time to leave. They left when H wanted, ran into construction and arrived late enough that H had to reschedule for a different day.

He was good with that. Had I nagged, they might have made the appointment, but he would have felt disrespected.

He would rather miss the appointment than feel like I don't trust him to do things successfully.

So now, I try really hard not to nag.