Unsure what's next, what to do.....Part II

[Wanted1]

My W probably thinks I'm going to be hanging out with my best friend this weekend. What she doesn't know is that he's actually not in town while I'm there. So, I contacted another close friend of mine from college who is a woman. We've always been pretty close friends but have never been intimate or that kind of "friends." To sound completely cheesy, we've always been good buds. I've sensed some jealousy from my W in the past about my relationship with this girl.

So, my question is, if W asks me before I leave, "So you are just going to hang out with best friend?" How do I respond? Right now I'm thinking I will just tell the truth. I will tell W, "best friend is out of town but I plan on getting to together with X since its been awhile and it'll be nice to catch up."

OK so the rule of thumb here is not to lie, but not to be real generous with information either. So you might say "no he's going out of town." Then if she asks if you're not doing anything after all then say "I still am, I made other plans." If she keeps pushing, THEN say "I plan on getting to together with X since its been awhile and it'll be nice to catch up." It's walking a fine line. Some LBS's are way too generous with info and others are way too stingy. The former makes it sound to the WAS like they are trying desperately to convince them they are not hiding anything, and the latter makes it sound like they are intentionally hiding something. But inbetween is where you want to be- I am living my own life and I will tell you about it if you insist but frankly I don't care to share it with you if I don't have to.

Can you hide threads periodically? My W walked in while I was composing the last message and she might have seen the headlines of numerous threads on here opened as tabs!

Cadet or Job can do that for you, and they can "unhide" them later if you want.

Thank you, AS. That's the answer I was looking for. The 'what if she keeps asking' angle of it.

I'm not trying to intentionally invoke jealously. However, that brings up something I thought I remembered reading in DR which was that sometimes jealously works in your favor. I believe there was a particular story in DR where MWD talks about a W accidentally sending some texts that were meant for someone else to her WAH.....she accidentally sent some that said "I can't wait to get together!" etc. and that turned him around. I wish that could happen in my case, but I'm afraid wishing for that would just lead to more disappointment.

ZERO expectations has been my theme this week.

In fact, I feel like if I can get away with not telling her who I'll be hanging out with, the better. She tends to take whatever I say or do the complete opposite of what my intentions are, so if I were to say I'm hanging out with X, rather than her getting jealous she would probably have the mindset instead that "Ok, he's moving on, good, now I don't have to worry about his feelings any longer! Let's file this puppy and get it over with!"