THEN, I got the following text from my W yesterday.
"I think you and I need to talk. Not to talk about the settlement but just to clear the air between us. I have asked my atty to get the court date pushed out until 2019. I felt like maybe we both need some time and a chance to communicate our feelings to each other. I know that you emailed my mom this weekend, which is why I am reaching out to you. I feel like we should probably talk through things with the help of a counselor, but if we need to meet to figure out how to arrange that, I am willing to. I don't know what your schedule looks like over the next week or so, but let me know. If you have no interest in talking to me, please let me know that if that's the case."
I would like to get the boards input here on how to best respond. Firstly, I know not to get excited and not to even think about any expectations. I do not think that this is just a temp check, but the skeptical part of me thinks that this is just a way for her to say later, look we did the counseling thing and it did not work so I was right to leave you.
Hero, I havent read your whole thread, but the post by R2C caught my eye. Basically, I agree you should have no expectations. I found my XW would say things like this as a way to get me somewhere to deliver bad news. I dont see anywhere where she is really saying that she wants anything to do with you - theres no real reason to suspect that there is a sudden change of heart veiled in the mystery of this text. To me, it could be that she is very angry that you reached out and wants to talk to you about "falling in line" with her plan.
So, I think it's fine to go talk. But I would go in with NO expectations. I agree with you that :"backing off" now seems odd given your pretty clear offer to "talk". But I would not be in a rush "I am pretty busy this week, but I can meet you on xxx or yyy at zzz time." I wouldnt send a feeler email about your schedule needing review or whatever. Just offer a couple options a little ways out. I wouldnt really say much more than that at this point.
