Unsure what's next, what to do.....Part II

[Wanted1]

W,

Hero is giving you great advice to not reach out to your ML.

I can tell by your posts that your mind is constantly racing that you have to do something to stop your W from leaving you. It's called the "illusion of action". The truth of the matter is when that happens it tends to make things worse. If you would of reached out to your ML it wouldn't have gone as you expected. The jealousy card won't work.

I was so excited when my ex was going to tell her dad because I thought it would change her decision. Besides her kids she loves her dad more then anyone in the world. She would never want to anything disappoint him. Well he let her have it telling her it was a big mistake, you can't break up your family and brought her to tears. Guess what, she got over it and didn't change her mind. He helped her move, painted her walls in her new house and cuts her grass. That's what parents do, stick by you even if they don't agree with their decisions.

Now I am going to be completely honest with you. Right now your W has a lot of $hit she needs to figure out. She is a serial cheater and needs help to figure out why. You have to give her the time and space to figure out her issues. It is probably going to include separation or divorce. You can't make matters better right now but you can surely make them worse.

She has to choose to want to be with you. That's the only way it works out long-term.

LH, thank you. I appreciate your comments.

You are absolutely right and while my head agrees with everything you say, a part of me (my heart I'm sure) keeps wanting me to do something to prevent what seems inevitable. I need to listen to my head more which I've done a pretty good job of doing so far this week.

I also understand that it's in God's hands and I just need to trust in Him.

As everyone knows, it's a roller coaster of emotions. Some moments I'm fine and others I'm absolutely heart broken and lost and feel as though I need to act not only for myself but for my kids. I want to protect my kids from the hurt of a potential out of the house S or D. My W thinks they will be "fine" and that we are both good parents and we don't need to be together to raise good kids and instill good qualities in them. That may be true, but it's still the emotional impact to them that she is overlooking. Which is ironic because it appears as though she's acting on complete emotion herself.