So, this conversation somewhat came up a few hours ago in our MC session. The therapist basically said that the most important thing is obviously communication. That if both parents work full time, then the 'chores' should be split equally too. She said the problems often happen because each person has a different idea of what 50/50 is, and their expectations aren't necessarily realistic.
As an example, W said that she would often come home from work, and have to do x, y, and z in the house. And she resented that I either didn't do those things since I got home before her, or at least offer to help her when she did get home. But what W didn't always realize was that before she got home, I just got done mowing the grass for 2 hours or cleaning out the garage. Neither of us communicated effectively, and that was a big problem.
I think, and women here would certainly know better than me, that few women will get 'turned on' watching their husband vacuum or wash dishes. But by doing those things (not all the time, not being a servant, etc), she'll possibly be attracted to the husband in a different way. Maybe emotional? I don't know, but my W said something like that in our first or second MC session.
Married: 15yrs Ages: Me 49, W 44 Kids: S12 BD: around 4/14
