It’s important to make sure your boundaries are enforceable. A weak boundary is worse than no boundary. For example - what happens if she doesn’t clean her laundry? Dishes? It sounds like more of a rule/expectation than a boundary.
Also, I think you did the right thing by walking away. But instead of saying “no”, keep it as none of her business. Why give her the answer if you also say it’s not her business?
Sounds like you’re doing well though. Enjoy your time with the kids!
