I guess this is piecing

[Did]

She isn’t doing IC at this point. Just MC and did IC once. I can’t make her do it. Its the same therapist. She gave W some books to read. One on self esteem and another on codependency. W puts on an amazing front and even I fall for it. But she says all she wants to do is lay in bed. Or I say I like being busy she says she’s the opposite. She watches movies every night by herself. Idk if we really have a chance. I need to be unavailable. And just Be there for d4 not W as much. Just do what MC says. No more sexual humor or trying to touch her. An exercise in mental toughness.

She knows how great of a guy I am. She has said I’m the best fuy she knows how admirable all the change is. That I’m completely different. No one as hot as me. Sex great. Date great. Wanted more. Asked how I did it how I learned to be open honest not scared of intimacy.

I think it’s her subconscious telling her she doesn’t deserve me and a happy family. I think she needs to know she doesn’t have me. I feel better when I don’t think about her...

I go to stay at a friends tonight then Hawaii tomorrow. That’s pretty GAL right?