I can sense how much you are hurting BUT I can also sense how much your W is confused and hurting. She cannot differentiate what it is that is causing her to hurt so much, so it is easiest to throw the baby out with the bathwater. I think you need to respect the position she currently thinks she is in because getting angry and trying to show her that she is wrong will backfire.
Don't take to heart anything that she says but don't try to prove to her that she is speaking nonsense. My coach said to me that when I try to point out that my Hs words were illogical, it only served to humiliate him. Nobody went back to a R because they felt humiliated.
Read the Lighthouse story. If anyone ever needed to be a lighthouse it is you at the moment.
