He asked where we were going but then added, before I could answer, “not that it’s any of my business.” I told him anyway.
Its funny when things like that happen. It's like they want to know what's going on with us, but they catch themselves because they know they have no right to ask. About two months ago we were having a BBQ for D12's birthday. H came over early to help set up ... or read the paper in the kitchen. At one point, H left to go to the supermarket. He was gone for about 2 hours. When he got back I asked him "did you get what you needed?". He looked at me, scowled, and said "Yes. And you don't need to ask !!!". Ever since then I don't ask him any questions. He still asks me though. He knows he shouldn't. But he does. Like you, I take the high road and give truthful (but vague) answers.
Originally Posted by DejaVu6
He said leaving them was the hardest part. I actually don’t believe him. I think he was running away from EVERYTHING that felt like pressure and responsibility. In actuality, even when he had the chance to spend more time with them (when I wasn’t around), he would still choose to leave.
I think your H is telling the truth. My H loves his kids. Of that I have no doubt. But when he was in the midst of it all he checked out on them as well. We would not see him for days. When D8 would try and cuddle him on the sofa, he'd push her off. He would get mad at D12 for any little thing. When they are in that "I need to run mode" even the children feel like pressure and responsibility. Once they've actually run they realise what they've done (well my H anyway), get scared that the children will hate them, and suddenly become super dad. As much as it [censored] for me, i try and look at it as a blessing.
re the risk. I guess the vet would say, as long as you did it for you and you did it with no expectations, then you cannot get hurt if he responds one way or the other. If he agrees, then enjoy the extra time with your sister. If he says no, then enjoy the time with your kids. Win win either way.
