Getting Back to my Old Self

[Dawn70]

DH,

I want to start by saying J9 was mistaken when he suggested the coach would tell you to ghost someone. He would not, he clearly teaches that when someone is not meeting your needs or offers different terms in a relationship (ie lovers to just friends) you need to communicate to them in a loving way that that is not acceptable to you. If the other person is not willing to meet your needs or come to an agreement on relationship terms that are acceptable to you, then you need to walk away and never look back. You keep the door open by saying if you change your mind then give me a call.

Now what happened to you with WG would have been prevented if you read the book. Coach teaches that until a woman is in love with you and you are in an exclusive relationship, the phone is used for making dates. Those 3-4 hour phone calls you were having are a no no. You are not her therapist, gay male girlfriend or her emotional tampon. (sorry his words). By having these phone calls she knows everything about you which takes away the mystery and excitement. Let's face it Don everything probably became predictable and boring. How long do you think that would last with a girl you nicked named wild girl?

Look I know you are skeptical but I think you would agree you need a new strategy. Like Einstein said " the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result"

Or what coach says "if you keep doing what you have been doing you will keep getting what you have been getting".

That's something to think about.

I still don't understand what is wrong with phone calls. I absolutely do NOT want to speak for Don nor am I trying to but it seemed to me when he was talking about those phone calls, they were occurring primarily because there was a distance between he and WG physically (as in they don't live in the same town) and they weren't seeing each other in person and therefore were communicating by phone. I mean, I get you and J9 are saying this dating coach that y'all are a fan of says this is a no-no, but if Don and WG were both into it and it was working for them, who cares what the dating coach says?

I like texting and phone calls and no that doesn't mean I'm using whoever I'm talking to as my therapist. I don't need to do that. I just like the idle "how was your day" chit chat and witty banter when I know I won't likely see someone for a few days. As I said on my own post the other day, maybe I'm the weird one. Maybe I'm just some sort of odd freak, but I just think if 2 ADULTS have something that is working for them, some arbitrary dating advice shouldn't matter.