So it has been a few days and I think I am calm about the documents I recieved. I reached out to my W to start discussing a settlement, hopefully without the need to get attorneys involved. I am waiting on her response. I have not yet retained an attorney.
I cannot help but feel like it is giving up or conceding defeat. I have read here and in other places that this is only a piece of paper in the long run and that you can still have hope, but I have to admit that I feel like this really is it... I am just stunned at the speed with which everything is moving. The ambush when she moved out and then less than 7 weeks later I get papers. Why the rush?
I continue to work on detaching and GAL, but I can feel this voice screaming inside of me to "do something". It is my blind faith in BD that is currently stopping me from doing or saying anything to try to stop the D. I do love her and her happiness does mean a lot to me, is letting go the only thing I can offer her?
I know I have changed in the past few months and learned much about myself and my failings. I am determined to learn from them to be the best version of myself moving forward, I just wish she would see it/notice it to. Are the 180s that I am doing not effective, should I be doing something different?
