Pam, I was where you are right now not long ago! But I was leaning more toward H and then myself.
You are worth more than that! I know there are a few here that are POed because you brought this up again. But I know how you feel, when you give up on life because you think there is no hope.
Find something to hold on to; your shelties for one is a good reason to hang on; they NEED you! So don't let them down.
I found something to focus on; well a few things, and that is what keeps me moving forward. Plus the fact that I want to hang around when my H's world crumbles and the OW is out in the cold. Maybe then he will realize and her too, what they did to our family and me. Don't get me wrong, this does not mean I will enjoy their pain so much as them coming to realize what they did and feel remorseful.
You have much to give and many reasons to live. It is your choice though and none of us can stop you.
