I just need to keep my focus off him and OW because thats what REALLY brings me down. Its awful.
The next time I see him will be Thursday night (tomorrow), and I dont think we have anything to really discuss as far as the baby is concerned so I will leave once he gets there. This Saturday is the night I need him for the night, so I asked him last night if he would like to just skip Friday night and have his own Friday night since he is watching her for me Sat night, or if he would still like to come Friday. And he said he would still like to come Friday. Which is fine.
Our text convo ended with him saying the whole "I guess one of us hates the other..nice!" and asking if we are only going to communicate when swapping the baby now. So I am pretty positive he will make a point to not reach out now and we will just communicate very little when swapping the baby.
I honestly feel better on days I dont have to see him. Nights when its just me and the baby seem to be easier for me, I stay busy with her and its nice. I wake up every day and feel the possibility of feeling down, and I just keep saying Kech, WOULD YOU EVEN WANT HIM BACK? Think about it! And I try to boost myself up.
