How do you typically respond when you learn you have inadvertently inconvenienced someone?
I usually apologize, and I think that would be appropriate here too. You went into her car and moved her thing without telling her. I understand you were trying to be nice, but in fact, you made her life less convenient. It's not a huge deal, but I do think it warrants an apology.
I went back and reread the incident, and I totally agree. I think I totally misread the account. I can understand why she might be irritated by being interfered with. Not to mention that right now, she doesnt want you in her space - so regardless of your intention, going into her personal haven (her car) without any kind of notice or awareness is kind of off limits.
Frankly, now isnt really the time to be using the 5 love languages on her, exactly. Imagine watching your wife make a cup of coffee in the morning for years, and NOW that she has asked for a divorce, you start doing it for her. It doesnt come off as caring, it comes across as fake and just drives her further away. It reminds her of all of the years that you DIDNT help.
Instead, now is a great time to learn about the 5 love languages and practice them with essentially everyone else. Friends, parents, stepson, coworkers, etc. How can you adopt the kind of mindset of showcasing your love for others?