AnotherStander, Thanks for the response. It took me a long time to figure it out but I realize that my reacting to her is just making things worse and pushing her further away. I am so determined to just stop, detach and not pay any attention to all the negative behavior. At this point she can do as she pleases and I will focus on myself. I know this is going to be a very long process and may not ever work. I have started taking more of the tough love approach and told her exactly what your friend told his wife " if you want to leave be my guest". She refused to entertain that idea but that doesn't really matter. I have put my foot down though and refuse to continue paying the majority of the bills. Again I was enabling her by allowing her all the freedom in the world and was essentially giving her extra money to go out and party by taking care of the household financials.
