A familiar story with questions VII

[SteveLW]

But it answer is always the same. Do you want a D? Then go ahead and file and move it forward? If not, then you are not ready. Continue to detach, GAL, and keep up the 180s.

Not sure where that came from. Steve, have you caught up in my sitch? I haven't indicated that I am moving any closer to a D. I either miscommunicated something or you misread.

Actually, I was distracted when I wrote that and didn't make the point the way I intended. I should have set it up with: "Many posters struggle with patience, and it causes them to contemplate filing for D when they do not want one." This was in relation to you trying to move progress along.

The overall point was that doing anything out of impatience (whether it is those contemplating D, or those that are starting to show signs of Ring but want to hurry things along) will not be helpful to your sitch. Sorry for the lack of clarity!

Okay, just thought you seemed a bit out of context.

I'm not sure that my motivation is out of impatience. This all seems like a dance and I simply wonder if it is my move. I have been reading about returning my Alpha (which I recommend for all LBSs BTW) and several sources refer to intimacy as being the responsibility of the male. Not just sex, but romantic intimacy, affection.

I kind of feel like at this point, I may have been put in the "Friend Zone".

If stay the course and continue to wait is the proper plan, I can do that.

I have yet to read where it is the Ws job to initiate the next step. IDK

Yeah I should have quoted your post.

Look this is a dance, and it is a delicate dance. Pursue and pressure too hard and too fast and she will run the other way quickly. You need to tread lightly. That is where the patience comes in. Maybe you've been friend-zoned, or maybe she is just going very slowly. For lots of reasons. But the lighthouse analogy still stands. You shine the light, she sails towards you. You do not go towards her. The time may come when you do become more aggressive, but you need to take it slow.

Now to your question about non-sexual physical contact. Look up Talk and Touch charges. I think your sitch is to the point where you could try those and see if it sparks a closer connection.