I have been wanting to post so much to you, but I've been incredibly busy moving. I have a lot to say, but I'll start small.
To me, men who cheat on and leave their wife while they are pregnant are disgusting to me. Absolutely despicable. I am sorry, short of addictions and abuse, there is no plausible reason to do something so disgusting to the mother of their child.
I read your posts and you are trying to employ some sort of tactic or pretzel yourself to become exactly what he wants so that he will drop his AP and come home to you. You are only concerned about what response your actions will yield.
Not for nothing, he should be begging his way back in. Begging for forgiveness. And you are so worried about doing right by HIM.
There was a poster here who's H left during pregnancy of their first child for AP. They did end up reconciling and going on to have 2 more kids. I have been friendly with her off this site for years now. She STILL has a hard time with forgiveness of what he did. But I will tell you, he only came home not because of tactics, or anything else. She lived her life for her and her daughter. She made herself the best self she could be. She didn't do it for him though. She did it for her.
You need to just become and act the way you want to be without concern for the results it might produce in him. If he is worthy of you, he will drop OW and work his butt off to be a partner to you and a father to his child.
You need to stop worrying about if what you do or don't do drives him back to OW. If he is worth his weight as a man, he will make the right choice. Right now, you be the best you that you can be for you and your baby. That's it.
