I'm curious about your son's request that you not contact his mom about the awards ceremony.

Was it like this:

Son: Dad, I'm playing at the awards ceremony. Don't tell Mom.

?

Or was it like this:

Son: I'm playing in the awards ceremony.
LW: Great! Do you want me to tell your Mom?
Son: No.

?

Me: 44
H: 44
Kids: 20, 16, 16, and 10
Together/Married: 22 years
H announced he was emotionally detached and considering D: 4/4/16
H announced he is going to try to stay and reconnect: 5/1/16