Hoosjim's 16th. Looks like we're piecing, folks.

[JRuss]

The doctor is making intimacy overtures to your wife, plain and simple. It may not in his mind be as a means to take things further to a physical level, but he's clearly opening up his (troubled) marriage to your wife and divulging very private things to her; he would be, if your wife allowed it, a willing emotional affair partner at this point. That she's his employee makes it even more inappropriate. Get a therapist, buddy. It's ridiculous, really.

Perhaps she could say something to him along the lines of "I know you're in a difficult place, but I'm friends with both you and your wife, and I don't feel comfortable having these sorts of conversations". It isn't waywardness on her part that she doesn't fully grasp how and why this is inappropriate AND a potential or actual trigger for you, but she ought to be able to hear you tell her your truth and follow through to nip this in the bud. It's been going on for a long time.