Thank you. Youre right. I am holding on SO tightly to that bc it terrifies me. I have no control whatsoever what happens with their relationship and it absolutely kills me every minute of every day. And youre also right that he hasnt faced losing me. I was thinking about that this morning. How he said he wants to come to watch D tonight and tomorrow night. That will put him at our house all weekend. And he knows ill go out and do things, but in this sitch its like I dont know how to make him face losing me. He comes to the house to watch D, so he sees how I am living. He has an inside view into our world still.
Back in June/July, I asked him to leave and I told him I needed time away from him, without him coming to the house or anything. After 2 days he sent me a text saying he couldnt stay away much longer and I asked what he meant and he said he couldnt handle being away from us completely like that. Away from me, the baby, the house, everything, and being away 100%.
So even though I leave when he comes, hes still getting that glimpse into our world, he isnt fully losing anything yet.And I dont really know how to change that in our sitch.
