Husband cheated, left, trying to DB 4

[burned]

we have tried many times to make it work since then and he just has never seemed really fully in it IMO

He won't be, until something changes. You. Want to hear about how "well" my 3 months of MC went, when W was still in her A? Hint: I'm still here fighting.

Things with this new OW just feel different to me.

I fall into this trap all the time. We project our emotions/thoughts onto reality and it colors how we see things. Could be 100% wrong.

Curious, and forgive me if I'm out of line, but have you thought about talking to your doctor about antidepressants? The reason I ask is because some of them also work really well for anxiety. But I'm not sure if you can take them while you're breastfeeding. There is a specific antidepressant that is known to work quite well for anxiety and isn't sedating/addictive but I don't know that I'm allowed to say anything about that here. That being said, psychotherapy has been shown to be as effective as medication to treat certain conditions like anxiety. And, if you can believe it, they did a head-to-head comparison of certain antidepressants compared to physical exercise, and it ended in a tie.

Just seems to me that some of the energy you're pointing at your H could be pointed at addressing this aspect of how your mind holds you back. My two cents.