I know it hurts... and the unknown future is scary for sure.
Keep in mind the only person you can control is yourself. Keep your dignity and moving forward. I get how if feels like you are wearing shoes of cement right now.
Lots of success stories.... but remember individual results may vary... ;-)
All hope is NOT lost because a spouse files for D. Remember your spouse is most likely hurting too. I think that is the most difficult thing for people on this board to accept. A spouse that leaves or walks out is often doing so out of desperation that they are feeling stifled or unheard.
DB is a great book for sure - helped me far better than a marriage counselor who in 10min told me there was no point to continue to waste her time it was over (yeah... even my H said what a piece of work as she couldn't know either one of us or our issues in 10min... he shared that with me after we recon our M.)
I can't stress enough though that there are other amazing books out there. One that will open your eyes to the I love you but phenomenon to help you see both sides. You need to look at your R through your H's eyes. Right now you are still in panic mode to do anything to save your M but you really need to look at yourself... learn about yourself... what makes you tick... what are your strong points... what areas need work... what you find joy in each day. You need to take the focus off your H and focus on yourself.
