Hard to be positive

[Ruby100]

Ure - thank you - your words have kept me strong all day even though I’ve been tempted to text him.

Why - I am sorry to hear that your situation is similar to mine. I’ve read your posts & feel your pain. I think we both know that detaching is necessary for our sanity but it’s not easy. When you’ve been married as long as we have, your whole life has revolved around that one person. It’s hard then to believe that you can stop being the most important person in their lives & that is one of the most painful parts of affairs.
Combine that with the age difference of us & the OW, it really hits you hard. I feel like I have lost my best friend & 2 years on it still takes my breath away.
I’ve read most of the books you have but also found David Kessler & Louise Hay’s book “You can heal your heart” really helpful. I’ve been using Tapping/EFT to manage the feelings of overwhelm & like you, I journal, a lot! I’ll checkout the other books you mentioned.
The difference between us is that my H visits to see our dog & chat to me. I think he believes that our friendship can continue but I’m not so sure - I don’t want to hear about their lives, holidays, future plans - it would be rubbing salt into a wound. I don’t think he sees anything wrong in it. Whether they want you in their life or not, it’s not easy.
I just wish you could fast track this stage. It seems that this is never ending at times.
I’m thinking of you & hope, that with all the things that you are doing, that you find peace.