I am so very sorry about your experience with the IC. I am in agreement with the others...time for a new one. They are suppose to be there to listen and guide you along the way.
Why do you think you are being mean when you respond to him the way that you do? I don't see it. There is no need to be chatty with him. I do think he's starting to sense that something is wrong is trying to get you to tell him what is going on. I wouldn't be very open about what you are thinking or doing at the moment.
Today is a new day, if you have the time, start the search for a new IC who is actually pro marriage. Many of us have had this experience and sometimes it takes more than one attempt to locate a good IC. Don't give up the search.
You aren't going to just "snap out" of this. It takes time to grieve for the loss of a relationship. You are going to have good and bad days and allow that pain to wash over you and then release it. Find ways to channel that anger and hurt, i.e., weeding a flower bed, punching a pillow, etc. You will find that releasing that frustration, hurt, etc., will help you heal. Remember, it's not you, but him and he needs to figure things out.
Keep the focus on you and your child.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
