Husband cheated, left, trying hard to DB 3

[Pax_luv]

Kech,
Haven’t posted to you before, but am Following along from a distance.

I’m not going to tell you how to respond, though I do believe in the friendly neighbor approach.

Your comments about your ic struck me. I agree with everyone else’s sentiments about finding an ic who truly understands your goals and the dynamic, but I also don’t disagree with what your therapist has told you.

Do you really want to be married to someone who lies, cheats and treats you like crap? Someone who openly abandoned your and your baby. No! Absolutely not. It’s hard to see that because many of us hold on to the idea and the fantasy of marriage. I know I did and holding onto that fantasy left me stuck. I should have taken action, but I didn’t. Like you, there was nothing anybody could do that would make me be the one to initiate the divorce. Instead it just prolonged the hurt and games.

Please don’t get me wrong, I’m not advocating for divorce. I’m saying let go of the fantasy. It’s hurting you. The reality is you are currently married to a liar and cheater.

Don’t mean to be gruff. I wish someone drilled that into my skull when I was doing exactly what you are now.