Husband cheated, left, trying hard to DB 3

[SteveLW]

And I cannot imagine how in the h@LL he is SO fine. Steve, in your sitch did you ever have a certain amount of time go by where WW just seemed completely fine in her own life without you? He is not living at home, I only see him now on the evenings of Tuesday Thursday Friday and Sunday and I see him for about 5 minutes total. And the communication we were having in between has now stopped for the most part. How long do you just go on as if youre heart isnt breaking into 2 when you know theyre just building a foundation with someone else? Its like if I dont step in he is going to just completely fall in love with her and forget everything good about us. I just dont know how long I go on like this. It has been about a week since our communication has dwindled down like this and I just feel like im losing my mind. Somethings gotta give.

kech, yes. My W for a good 2 months, a little more actually, was completely happy and enthused when discussing her new life without me. And she was depressed and sad if she ever discussed giving up that dream. At one point, related to not wanting to ruin our D's life she said "well I guess I can just stay married and be miserable". She once said she thinks she could stay for our D if we slept separately. The point was there was nothing in what she was saying or doing that there was in room in her for mind for properly Ring and moving forward together a H and W. And it was hard.

But guess what, she moved closer to R when I was happy and upbeat. And closer to D when I was sad and depressed. WASs have already reconciled in their own mind that they have to hurt you to get what they want. When you are hurt then they are find moving forward because that's the way its supposed to be. "I want out. I have to hurt you to get out, therefore when you you are hurt I know that everything is moving forward properly."

When you aren't hurt it makes them go "Hmmm, what is going on? I expected her to be devastated. For her to beg me to stay. For her to crying to me every night to change my mind! She seems fine....hmmmm, I need to keep an eye on this."

I feel like I should have never asked him to leave the house at this point honestly. He was cake eating, but at least he was there and we could have probably eventually built off that. Am I wrong in this thinking?

This is terrible thinking and it isn't based on reality. He was there......AT NIGHT. You admitted he was ALWAYS GONE otherwise. This is kech trying to romanticize how great things were before she stood up for herself and kicked him out. Sorry for this 2x4, but LBS are masters at rewriting history too.

But hey, if you want to be with a lying, cheating, drunken absentee H and father then don't let us stand in your way. Call him up and invite him back home. It didn't keep him away from OW before....and it won't keep him away from OW now either.