Sia, That is a good way of looking at it. Pretending he is dead. Heck it feels like a death why not treat it that way. My husband has to feel guilty. How could any man leave a pregnant wife out of the blue alone and not feel shame / guilt? He was a zombie for about a month after too. Could barely stay awake ...lost weight ... wouldn’t look me in the eye. Just totally not himself. He seems more “normal” lately but I don’t know if that’s a bad thing. I just can’t wait for the day it hits him like a ton of bricks that he gave up on his family the most important thing in his life. I believe whether it’s MLC / affair / depression he is still deep in this “fog” and fantasy land and not thinking long term conquesences or about our families future.
I feel a bit stronger than the past couple of weeks. I try to remind myself of all the bad he has done and pain he has caused and it makes me feel confident / almost like letting him go is the “right” thing to do.
I did ignore a FaceTime call last night and that was a first for me. His bday is Saturday and I want to ask him to come over for cake w the kids but on the other hand why set myself up for disappointment if he says no ?? I just don’t know I feel like I need a miracle to get my loving husband I knew back.
