Ok, so you've called him this morning to verify if the time would work for him and he's responded back w/an answer.
Right now, he's going to treat you just like he would anyone else that comes in contact w/him. I know it hurts like heck, but that's the way they behave when they have walked out the door. They make every effort to shut down their feelings for us and what they had. It's difficult for them to do this, so that is one of the reasons that they do not stay in contact because they do not want to feel guilty or ashamed of what they are doing.
When he comes over, you can ask him if he's okay or how are things going. You can fill him in on hat's happening w/your child (children) and keep the conversation on neutral things. Don't be too chatty and give him the opportunity to open up and talk if he feels the need to do so. Listen to what he has to say and look him in the eye when you are speaking to him. Do not challenge or argue w/him. Just listen, don't offer up advice unless he asks for it. Do not tell him everything that you are doing. You want him to leave and wonder what you are doing these days. A little mystery goes a long way.
One thing that I always suggest is to look your best and put on the best act that you can when you are in their presence. If you look mopey, that ramps up their guilt and they do not want to come around because it makes them feel bad.
Hang in there. If you have time, re-read the Detachment thread and the thread that Sandy has out there (I think they are linked in the homework thread that Cadet provided to you a while back).
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
