I must have stopped DBing a while ago maybe because my heart has started rejecting WH. A few weeks ago was his bday and I didn’t even ask for advice on the forum. He called himself so kids could wish him and I wished then. He had asked to take kids out for dinner so when he came to pick up I wished in person again. No cake no dinner as a family, my Ds don’t know any better and I didn’t want to set false traditions. Sigh , I think I have been learning indifference rather than loving detachment
Sia, I don't think so at all! I let my H cake eat and did not DB in the beginning, and it only hurt me as I allowed him to cake eat and gave myself false hopes. He knew I was plan B. He also saw me vacillate between sad/needy and then very angry. ... I actually think indifference is a good thing! I personally don't like the "lovingly detach" concept. It's more human nature (and believable) to create distance and then try and remain civil, minus any kindness or friendship!
I have said this before, but you are so far ahead of where I was when my H moved out! ... would you be willing to link your old threads here for kech, or are they deleted?
Blu
“Forgiveness liberates the soul. It removes fear. That is why it is such a powerful weapon.” – Nelson Mandela
