Look man there are no easy answers. You say you truly don't want a D so you shouldn't file for a D.
What it comes down to is what are your boundaries, your values how do you view yourself.
Are your boundaries I will not be in a M with someone who is actively seeking other men on a dating site? Do you love yourself and value yourself enough to say this is BS and I am not going to put up with it anymore? Do you see yourself as a catch and realize there are plenty of woman out there that would love to have a guy like me?
IMO you should start with trying to get her to move out of the house. Tell her you are done with the BS and offer to pack her $hit and put it in the garage until she can make arrangements to pick it up when she gets a place.
If you continue to wait for something to change while you are still living together, you are going to suffer immensely my friend. If you keep doing what you been doing you will keep getting what you have been given.
