Ovrrnbw ...my H said he meant it when he dropped the Dbomb,and it was a relief and he feel horrible about the pain he is causing me...he had tears in his eyes, and I said i would rather be in his shoes than mine..and since that I have been gone...traveling, visiting my parents, having my sister here etc. so we really havent spoken about the hard stuff until yesterday when he initiated it. He said we are NOT talking and I said i thought we were going to take a deep breath after dropping my son off at boarding school...in any event he brought up the MC. To be truthful I was hoping that time away would change his mind but he seems to be standing his ground. Would love to know how you are doing now, how long ago did youre W leave? I am hoping MC gives me some peace about D my H, I read that couples feel like it helped them but I am skeptical.
BURNED...after H said her would go to counseling I told him I would do some research but he said he wanted a recommendation from my therapist who he knows. I really think he will go but quite frankly I am fearful mostly because it will come out how unhappy he has been and all the negative stuff about me etc...and they feel like arrows to my heart. I am sorry for you’re situation. If you dont mind me asking how long have you been S? D? Are you doing better? Did you go to IC? Did it help get you through? I read it takes 5yrs after a divorce to feel healed...
I told him that I wont go if he is just going there to appease me and nothing else and he said he would not do that. We sat on the couch and held hands and we talked about seeing my parents in the next few weeks and staying with my sister and her H while there. Also spoke about getting our son visiting my parents and his D over Xmas break. Both of our dads are elderly. He was very cooperative about future plans and said no matter what we had to be united when it came to dealing with our son. Which I feel like I am not that kind of person but i know divorce can bring out the ugly in people.
I asked him if he minded holding me in bed last night which he said , of course I dont mind. He was rubbing my shoulders, I know i was not in DB mode but I kind of feel like its not worth the effort. But yet going to MC gives me a shred of hope. Right now I honestly feel like leaving, just ditching all the pain and crushed feelings and going back to my hometown and getting on with my life instead of dragging this out and being with him day to day. It hurts like nothing I have ever experienced.
