I think i also sometimes get consummed with the feeling, that i SHOULD be going on dates, watching tv, sleeping with ex. Not the person i am with. I know logically it does not make sense. I have to go over and over in my mind. He left me. He lied to me. He hurt me financially. He campaigned against me early on so he would not look like a bad guy. He is not a dead beat dad, but he is not a good dad. He was realy cruel the way he left. He was notba good companion.
So I guess those thought stem from not appreciating what i have. We are both more of the committed, forever type i think. And this type of loss affects us more. Sandi once mentioned that she did not underatand the LBS. She did not understand how we hold on to the walk away. My mom is like that too. She does not understand the attachment.
There are others that call it trauma bonding though. So who knows.
