Husband cheated, left, trying SO HARD to DB 2

[burned]

Having a rough Monday morning over here. Ive said, mornings are really rough for me.

For me it's because I wake up with "hope" and I forgot some of what I learned and got better at the day before. But your brain is doing work behind the scenes. It's your heart that needs to harden.

I see now how easy I have made this for him.

Don't blame yourself. He has made it easy for himself by taking advantage of what he knows about how you will react. You have just been being yourself. Not a failure -- a chance to learn to do something different.

Sometimes I wonder if Im seeking advice from so many different readings that im becoming mixed up in what to do, but it was ALL helpful.

Here's my own 2x4, because it's something I'm working on, too -- are you the kind of person who asks for lots of advice and then can't decide what to do, or who to "obey" (not in a bad way), because you're looking for some kind of certainty and right answer? People on here have been kicking me around trying to get me to learn how to make decisions FOR MYSELF and it's super, super hard.[/quote]

im pretty terrified I just gave him even MORE of a way to build relationship stronger and stronger with OW.

People keep saying that A's "flare out" and maybe this one will, too. In my sitch I wonder if "depriving" WW of contact with OM was actually making her want him more. So, maybe just let him have at it. Be the better person. Don't be the one telling him "You can't have her." We want what we can't have, I'm told. Here's the attitude I'm trying now: "Fine, you prefer him over me. I'm a better person, so...suit yourself." It's not easy.

One thing you probably will be able to do by DBing is preventing him from going to a different OW.

YOU are his next OW!