First post - Wall is up, wife wants a divorce

[ovrrnbw]

People recover from all sorts of situations. I understand why you would get choked up, but right now is not a good time to share those emotions with her. She sees you as a gay friend, and then you cry in front of her. If you were to be the alpha male jock dickhead instead, you'd stand a better chance of finding that spark again.

When she brings up that she's done you just validate. When she talks about divorce, you tell her she is free to do what she wants but you will not assist in D.

The "inevitable" is unknown to you, so "Act As If" you will be fine and the relationship will be fine. Or, if you'd rather be the victim, continue to play the victim.

What are you doing as far as "keeping busy"? Are you following Sandi's rules? Have you even read all of Cadet's links or any other threads? You need to get active on those, b/c you will see advice that may apply to your situation.

Right now, from what I can tell, you are just a scared, whipped little puppy dog. You're upset that you hardly ever talk in the same house. So what? I can tell from this end of the internet that she feels the pressure from you. Quit trying to force conversation, quit trying to force her to think about stuff she just told you she doesn't want to think about. When you pressure, she just wants to remove the pressure - which is you in this case. When you pressure, she doesn't get the chance to think about things fully.