This woman walked out on me 4 years ago, with absolutely no warning, after almost two decades together! Now here she is, showing NOTHING except that she wants me back in her life and all you ever want from me is me to just bang her!
This is not true. I want to you you reconcile. I want to see you become her lover. I want you to give people here hope that what they believe is true. The grass is not greener on the other side.
The issue I have always had with you is your actions don't line up with your words. You act like you can take her or leave her but yet you are so scared she will rebuff you and you will lose her.
Listen we all have opinions on the matter. Personally I think you have watched one to many romcoms where you think she is magically going to fall in love with you if you keep being available to her and her friend.
I am more of a direct and to the point kind of guy. You never have to apologize for wanting a woman.