The beginning of a long and painful journey

[Rawpain]

Thank you all so much for your advice and encouragement . I am definitely heading out on my bike tomorrow. I have the kids tonight so cant do tonight.

Hoosjim. Regarding my Faith . I lost mine quite a while ago. My mum still attends the church I used too and has been inviting me around to church get togethers to meet people. I have attended 2 so far and it is good for me. I will try and keep that up. Many older and younger people in the congregation though but it might lead to other groups of people.

Just an update after posting yesterday my W said she wanted to come around to talk. She arrived with the kids and wanted to talk about the house. W has stated that she doesnt want any money for the house and just wants her name off the deeds.
There isnt any money if we sell and my mum paid the deposit out of my inheritance. W only paid half of 6 months of mortgage payments So this does seem fair to me. It also sounds too good to be true...

Then she asked if I was happy for us just to stay separated or would I want a divorce. I told her I would rather the divorce. For me just being separated just feels like more disrespect towards me. W said we can do the divorce for around £550 and have it done in about 2 months if we file it as unreasonable behaviour - understatement! ... but this seems the cheapest and easiest way. We both agreed to research both topics and discuss it in the future. W did not state if she was going to file or if that was a hint that I should do it.

I was very casual and played it as cool as I could. No other R talks. Not really any emotion just grey rock. I didnt feel it was the time to act the happy chappy role. I probably could of validated more but I just listened really. It was hard trying to have a conversation with someone when they can only look every where else except at me .

Thanks again to you all for reading and chopping in with advice.