Have been busy in detaching,GAL, being present with S, growing my support/meeting new people. Looking at switching up my career to where I don’t have to travel so I can maintain custodial agreement. May take a significant salary hit, but I need to maintain the focus on S.
W has been reaching out for various things and trying to make excuse to come and “stop in” at marital home. My ability to trust anything she does is challenged to the core, as last time we talked unrelated to S, she had her attorney twist the conversation. Her MLC fog seems to be thickening as her actions at times have been just viscous, cold, and calculating.
It’s been 5 1/2 months since BD and her nastiness seems to get worse the further the drags out. Of course I want nothing more to get my MR and family back as a single unit, but I’ve been having moments to where I feel if we could ever get to a point where trust isn’t in question. I know I have to completely let her go if there’s a chance for any future relationship with her. If D in fact goes the distance, I can’t say I will be friends with her. Co parenting is a challenge right now....WAW continues to use S as a pawn to get what she wants, when she wants it. I know while in MLC they only focus on themselves and can somehow justify their actions.
Her actions are having a limited effect on me from what she can tell....but I do get hurt in the fact that the damages she’s caused impact S. I refuse to react like I did initially, stay calm, and patient. I know I don’t have any impact on how fast she goes through her journey, or if she ever will. Just continue to pray she finds her way in time and that I will be there to support her with love and forgiveness. Just keep the focus on me and be AMOAFWL.
Two steps forward, 3 steps backwards is how I feel...
Me - 38 W-37 S6 M 10 years T 13yrs BD 3/18 W moves out 4/18 W files 7/18
