Divorce and Acceptance part 3

[Pax_luv]

You guys...thank you so much for chiming in. I appreciate it.

I can’t really quote on my phone, but OneArt, you mentioned the narcissist and how they love the fight. Yes, that fits my ex to a t. He looooooooves the fight and loves the opportunity to think he has outwitted his opponents. That was always something that I thought was odd with his personality as I am the complete opposite. While I am empathetic, I quickly became a doormat with him. This was brought up in our counseling by our t, but he continued to blame me.
So, at the end of the day, like you mention OneArt, this is just going to have to be a situation where he burns himself out.

In terms of fighting, I’m still not on the offense... I’m still playing defense trying to protect myself from his bullying and lies.

Thanks for filling me in on the art of war, Andrew. Speaking of playing defense..... I am pretty familiar with who I’m dealing with so at least I have that on my side. I know some of the plays in His playbook. Had I not known what he was capable of, I may have made some pretty monumental mistakes early on... but because I knew he was manipulating me, I was able to stand up for myself, which caused a whole lot of fury on his end.

Thanks for the kind words DNJ! I appreciate them. The blessing for all of us is our ability to see things differently either in our current state or our future state. I appreciate the awakening and awareness that has developed as a result of the experience.


I can’t share too many details of the situation, but I’m in a community property state. He’s trying to ensure I walk away with zero, zilch, nada and I pay him spousal support. If you even knew the crap he has pulled, you would be floored. Our accountant uncovered some things I didn’t even know.

I hope I don’t offend anyone with this gender stereotype (I don’t mean to be offensive) but this guy is not a man. He’s a sorry excuse for a man. What kind of man makes the decision to divorce his wife, wipe out their bank accounts, lie, lie, lie, buy cars and houses (plural) after the separation and claim that the wife (who is literally barely living paycheck to paycheck) makes more than him and should owe him spousal support.... when he makes 4 times more than her. That’s not a man at all. Again... apologies for referencing that kind of stereotype... but he’s a dirtbag weasel. There’s no honor or duty in his veins.

So, a mini update.... recent developments have me suspecting that ex’s lawyer may soon be getting the boot. I feel bad, he seems like a nice enough guy. He’s probably not used to dealing with this caliber of human.

In other news, I’ve been working really hard on getting out of my funk and it’s helping. I’m still a bit stir crazy and want to switch things up (maybe throw caution to the wind a lil), but I’m not walking around with sheer sadness. I’ve been exercising, forcing myself to eat better, I’m reading, and just trying to take care of myself. It’s working!

That’s all I got for now. I, once again, am picking myself up by the boot straps and taking steps forward. I can do this.

Much love to you all.