Husband cheated, left, trying to DB

[burned]

Do I just continue ignoring the tone?

Yup.

He flips things and it’s really upsetting me and it’s almost as if he is getting away with laying blame on me I do not deserve.

He is laying it on you. We know he's wrong, but he doesn't. BUT: he's only getting away with it if you let him.

I’m thinking you’ll tell me to ignore it, that he’s baiting me.

I'm trying to think of what the experts would say. I'm not sure if ignore is the right word. But can you respond in a way that shows him, and shows YOU, that his strong words don't cut you as deeply as he wants them to? Have you tried it, and if so, what effect did it have? If it works, do it more. If it doesn't work, do it less.

I think everyone knows how hard it is to resist the urge to respond a certain way when someone we know and love does something to us. As a person who has not always been good at controlling his emotions, I can tell you it's not easy. But each time you do it, you get a little bit better at it...