Husband cheated, left, trying to DB

[SteveLW]

I will read over all that asap.... anyone ever feel like they just need hope to keep going?

The hope issue has been discussed here before (in other people's threads, I believe Davide's most recently). The trick is to find the right about of hope. Too much hope will trip you up. Too little hope and you give up. You have to find the right level of hope that will keep you wanting to DB, but not so much that you are a sucker for his temp checking, word, and even actions.

IE, the lighthouse. The lighthouse doesn't move. It doesn't actively save anyone. It just stands solid and sure on the shore shining the light home....but it is up to the vessel to navigate to the harbor. If there was no hope then lighthouse would just shutdown the light since it would be fruitless to continue shining. But there is always hope the vessel will see the light, want to be rescued, and navigate into the harbor.....on its own time of course.